40 Acts of Lent: Day 6 - listen

Act six - Listen by Maureen Wilson

Propped up against a wall, one hand holding a sandwich, one hand holding a phone, one ear on a friend updating us on their day, one on the football scores. Sound familiar? We're hearing, but not always listening. And listening can be the simplest way to relieve the burdens of others. Today, make a point of giving someone the profound gift of your availability and vulnerability.

"To answer before listening – that is folly and shame."                                                                                                          Proverbs 18:13 (NIV) We hear in the news that the mental well-being of young people in this country is at a crisis. Mental health and social work teams are stretched beyond capacity. Even government acknowledges the need for 'more to be done'. It is also widely acknowledged that listening can make a significant contribution in early intervention or even prevention. The practice of listening is often vastly misunderstood and undervalued, yet its healing power is immense. We ignore its importance at a cost, not least for our own faith journey. We are made in the image of a God who listens and who longs for us to be a listening people. 'Many people are looking for an ear that will listen. They do not find it among Christians because these Christians are talking where they should be listening. But he who no longer listens to his brother will soon be no longer listening to God either.' Dietrich Bonhoeffer – Life Together Good listening has the potential to transform communication within families, schools, churches, NHS, workplaces and communities, impacting positively on well-being. Listening helps people feel valued, empowering them to tell their story, find their own solutions and experience resilience within. Listening helps people feel they are not alone. We all have the ability to listen – to give our attention and affirmation to others in our daily lives. Listening is not a soft option – it is a gift to be offered with compassion, humility, integrity and authenticity, recognising our shared humanity and vulnerability. Could YOU offer the gift of listening?

Choose how to complete this act...

GREEN OPTION: Make a conscious effort to remove any distractions when someone's talking to you on the phone (long phone calls are a prime opportunity to tune out – let's be honest), and really try to focus. YELLOW OPTION: Think about someone you haven't talked to in a while. Or someone who you talked with yesterday, but only gave half your attention to. Fix that today. RED OPTION: Make this a habit. Work on the skill of listening well – really put in the hours – and then give it away as a gift, so that others get an opportunity to tell their stories. Consider accessing good-quality training to give you the right tools to be an effective listener.